Often we spend time in classes and practice groups discerning the difference between being angry or mad, from dropping more into your feelings and in discerning what is truly going on —feeling more sad, for example.
Let’s just take a break from that.
Our built in mechanism to let us know what’s important to us can be simple to use. Whether you are sad or mad (or disappointed, frustrated, furious, despairing, or freaked out), you can come to the conclusion that what ever was or is happening is something you want to be different. It isn’t necessary to go any further thinking this part through.
Let’s keep it simple.
Ask yourself 2 questions:
1. Why do I want it to be different? What is this event reminding me of that is quite important to me? This will be the needs that are unmet.
2. Can I do something right now that will bring me closer to the experience I am hoping to have? (meeting those needs)
Important to note that for #2, that deciding right now that you will do something later is doing something right now. It is a yes. It might be inconvenient to change what you are doing right now. Possibly later on in the day you will ask someone for a conversation, or in the morning you will meditate on the needs, or you will start a job search next week. These are requests of yourself. You are making an agreement with yourself right nowto do something later. It counts.
Go ahead and practice this for a week or two. Let me know how it is impacting your life.